Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female Pokémon breeding, Vaporeon is the most compatible Pokémon for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Vaporeon are an average of 3"03' tall and 63.9 pounds. this means they're large enough to be able to handle human dicks, and with their impressive Base stats for HP and access to Acid Armor, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there's no doubt in my mind that an aroused Vaporeon would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the moves Attract, Baby-Doll eyes, Captivate, Charm and Tail Whip along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it'd be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Pokémon comes close with this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your Vaporeon turn white. Vaporeon is literally built for human dick. Ungodly defense stat + high HP pool + Acid Armor means it can take cock all day, all shapes and sizes
Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female Danbooru commenting, Mydickhurts is the least funny commenter for Danbooru? Not only are they necrobumping, which is mostly comprised of unfunny comments, Mydick hurts' comments are an average of -8 score. this means they're annoying enough to be hidden in comments, and with their impressive downvote stats for comments, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly unfunny biology, there's no doubt in my mind that a Mydickhurts would be incredibly unfunny, so unfunny that you could easily cringe at one for hours without getting sore.
that's it I'm done writing this there's too much and I'm not that creative
likely nothing would actually happen. Most of its dex entries say Vaporeon's cellular structure is similar to water's, so it'd probably just reform itself after you blend it. still, this would be a traumatizing experience for the Vaporeon, so don't actually do this to yours.
