Translation source as a direct reply to the post – translation by Paracite (@TheParacite on Twitter and Reddit), typesetting by Mushi107 (Twitter) / Hades334 (Reddit)

I see no good reason to torture yourself into liking coffee black unless you absolutely need that caffeine and there is no creamer or sugar to be had.

Don't force it, kiddo. Bismarck oneechan or Mainz oneechan can turn it to mocha, albeit the light cruiser's gonna die a little inside

Agreed. However, on the other hand, I don't want her ever to grow up. She's a natural-born toddler.